This 4 blog series discusses the horrific parts of the job search process called the Resume (Part 1), Networking (Part 2), Interviewing (Part 3), and a surprise topic (Part 4).
Interviewing
It’s Like the Worst First Date Ever!
- What if I fart?
- Did I forget to put on underwear?
- Am I babbling?
- Suite, slacks, pant suite, jeans, tie, no tie, NAKED?
- How do I start the conversation?
- Am I babbling?
- Am I sitting up straight?
- Am I babbling?
- Do I have food on my mouth?
- How is my breath?
- Am I babbling?
How You Really Want to Answer the Questions
If we could only be HONEST:
- Tell me about yourself:
- I need a fuc**** job
- Walk me through your resume
- It’s in front of you, idiot!
- Why did you leave your last job?
- My boss was an as**ole
- What is your greatest weakness?
- 20 years of psychoanalysis and I still don’t know
- What is your greatest strength?
- Lovemaking, at least according to ME
- Why do you want to work for our company?
- See first answer
- What makes you unique?
- I can burp the alphabet, twice
- Will you fit into the culture here?
- I don’t know, do you serve beer Monday mornings?
- Do you have any questions for me?
- I am too fuc**** tired at this point
- We will get back to you shortly
- I’ll be dead by then
Next Week is the Secret Topic!
